fashion anathema: the thuggie

In what is apparently the bastard offspring of a snuggie, a hoodie, and a tall tee, behold the Thuggie, a "pants optional" (according to the website) garment designed to give the wearer a surefire, completely hormone-free method of birth control. I DO NOT cosign this look (outside of an ironically-themed hipster "thuggie" party OMG GOOD IDEA) but if given a "Would You Rather" involving this and those five finger running shoes I'd go Thuggie all the way and rock that shit with some leggings and Isabel Marant wedge high tops. Done and done.

So, which would you rather? Wear a Thuggie for a week straight, or the five finger running shoes?

sister wife

When I wore this skirt to work yesterday, one of my colleagues started calling me "Big Love."

I guess that makes this outfit Church of LDS approved. Oh joy.

wearing skirt from Ramona West Vintage, Beautiful People (?) sweater, random tank, vintage belt, H&M socks, and Dolce Vita boots

the best/worst of nyfw

Judging by my butt hurt silence on the subject, I'm sure you can guess I did not receive a special invitation to sit front-row at any New York Fashion Week shows. HOW RUDE.

I did however, deign to sift through all 9,000 photos on Style.com to pick out my favorites and least favorites.

First, the highlights:



Candy-colored paint splatters (and kick-ass platforms) at Alexandre Herchcovich, supreme print-mixing at Proenza Schouler, and sporty stripes and roomy slacks (and a blue turban that I need on my head right now) at Jason Wu.

Loving the long, neutral silhouettes brought to us by Bensoni, Prabal Gurung, and Matthew Ames

Woodsy prints at Rodarte, tea-stained lace at Vivienne Tam, and furry, pom-pom knits at Frank Tell

And now, the lowlights, AKA anything so ugly that I would rather wear a dead baby or strap flaming turds to my feet.



The only addition that could make this dress more suggestive of female genitalia would be to have a long red chiffon scarf poking out of the middle--or a babydoll head. (Marchesa)
This outfit is available for less at your local Wilson's Leather (Ralph Lauren)

Not sure whether a hip pocket for your electric razor and a couple of tubes of lipgloss is an amazing idea or just a really really misguided one. Thanks, VPL, for thoroughly confusing me.

Do you want the world to be your gynecologist AND make it look like you don't have a waist?!? Then boy oh boy do I have the monokini for you... (Staerk)

What were your favorites/least favorites from NYFW?

tall tee

Wearing F21 tank dress, ASOS cardigan, vintage belt, H&M shoes, vintage bag

 
Enjoying the sun drenched side streets in San Jose this weekend on my way to a friend's house for UFC 118 (where Frankie Edgar defeated BJ Penn in the saddest, most heartbreaking way possible, and Randy Couture put a whole bunch of whoop ass on a doughy boxer who should have known what was coming to him). Ok I'm done geeking out now.

 I drunkenly bought this tank dress on Friday during a post-happy hour Forever 21 run. It's basically an extra long glorified wife beater, which I love except for the fact that it's slightly see through in the rear region, necessitating a pair of black biker shorts to avoid looking like one of San Jose's Finest.*

Let's all have a fantastic week everybody!

*San Jose's Finest is an epithet assigned to anyone who looks like a ho in broad daylight, has a serious case of muffin tops, is blasting Trey Songz on her Samsung in Target, or cussing out a child that ends up being her own offspring. In no way do I mean to indicate that everyone in San Jose is this classless, just that there's an awful lot of them.

extreme poodles

Watching a show about competitive poodle grooming has gotten me thinking about the myriad creative outlets we have for our deep-seated daddy issues and psychoses. It's just kind of sad to take it out on a poodle, don't ya think? At least have the decency to put your toddler in a swimsuit competition or marry a Real Doll. Leave the fucking dog out of it.

To make it worse, entrants are judged in the following categories:

- Scissoring (seriously)

- dye job

- "wow" factor




Kobe does not approve of extreme scissoring:

don't wanna kiss, don't wanna touch, just smoke one cigarette and run

wearing H&M top, J Brand jeans, Moschino belt, Zara flats, Infinity scarf from Marshalls, vintage and thrifted jewelry

Please excuse the irritating smirk on my face. I don't mean to direct my "fuck off" face to you, dear readers. That face is reserved for:

People who stand in the way of me trying to do my best work

The Muni transit system

The dude who spent 5 minutes putting on mascara or God knows what while I was clearly waiting for his parking space

and Republicans (always)

Here's to a better tomorrow.