duly noted: Edwardian dresses

Vintage Edwardian dresses via Neon Navajo ($175), VeraVague ($350), Decojumeau Antiques ($125), and Neon Navajo ($200)

Blame it on Downton--I'm suddenly noticing the postwar white cotton ankle skimming dress like, everywhere. BCBG's FW 2013 collection showed a fairly modern version paired with the Fall '13 topper of choice, a wool beanie. An unnamed street style subject paired hers with Charlotte Olympia kitty flats and a classic Chanel bag. And hours of etsy searching has unearthed a few lovely options-- the only catch being that most of them have 22 inch waists and hefty price tags (especially for the sturdier pieces). I may be able to save up, but it's unlikely that I'll ever squeeze into something that small without a can of Crisco, a pair of forceps, and an iron-clad pair of Spanx.

golden globes recap

Poehler. Fey. A bunch of waxed, injected, bronzed celebrities. What could be better?

First off, I should disclose that my opinion on Amy Poehler and Tina Fey is colored by the fact that I would go gayelle for them. Tina has literally never looked so hot at an awards show, and damn you Amy Poehler for wearing the femme tux of my dreams. Well played.

I have professed my weakness for clothing that should be wallpaper here and here, so it should surprise no one that I got major butterflies for this amazing Carolina Herrera on Lucy Liu. The fact that it could double as floor-to-ceiling curtains in the drawing room at Downton Abbey only endears it to me more.

You might think Jenny's lace and nude dress is reading a bit too ice capades does evening wear, but my god, if I ever saw this woman dressed down without a look on her face like she's in heat, I think I'd die of shock. It's her brand.

Despite the fact that she's spent the last 7 years starring in the worst rom coms ever, Kate Hudson has had some great red carpet moments. And I'm going to go ahead and say that this McQueen dress is one of them. I can forgive her that keyhole neckline just this once though.

 Sienna Miller has reached Chloe-Sevigny-like mythical status in my book. She almost always nails it even when everyone thinks she doesn't. However, I don't know about this Erdem look. The 3D texture is fun, but in a high-necked, floor-length tube dress she looks like the decorative covering for some sort of bathroom accessory. Too harsh?

On a more positive note, her barely-there makeup and simple trio of diamond studs in one ear looked fresh and modern, and proved she's still clairvoyant when it comes to anticipating exactly what I would want to wear:

Apparently, the color of the night was periwinkle. Nicole Richie nailed a 60's South-Beach-divorcee-goes-on-a-cruise vibe with this Naeem Khan gown. The drunky-eyes only added to it.

But honestly, the best-dressed of the night has to go to one person and one person only. Ladies and gentleman, for an outstanding display of 19th century facial hair, the Golden Globe goes to...

Bill Murray!

nothing but met

Allow me to go all Joan Rivers on you and give you my take on the Met Gala red carpet fashion. No really, please let me do it. I'm dying to share.

Disclaimer: Chloe Sevigny gets an automatic pass from me on all matters that concern fashion. That being said, I honestly do like this mirrored Miu Miu shift dress in an Andy Warhol/Edie Sedgwick let's-get-almost-naked-and-experiment-with-LSD kind of way:

Rihanna in head to toe Crocodile skin--a look that I would HATE on Renee Zellweger or January Jones but that just works on her because she is a saucy little sexpot. Also, because she could claw your eyes out. (Dress by Tom Ford)

Carey Mulligan (aka Michelle Williams v. 2012) in huge ass Prada sequins/fish scales. I like how the spangles light up her left cheek. I'm a whore for sparkly objects though, so it gets a full-on cosign by me.

Solange (the OTHER Knowles) is kind of a fashion darling right now, and I can see why. She's wearing the hell outta this Rachel Roy dress. And hats off to her for going bare-necked. It is so tragically unhip to wear a billion diamonds. Save it for the Oscars.

Don't you DARE say anything bad about Elisabeth Banks' Mary Katrantzou dress. I adore it. The little capelet is like a minaudiere for your shoulders.

Ok, before you go all apeshit proclaiming that SJP should march her dress right back to the set of  Little House on the Prairie, let me just say this one thing--the shoes match the dress. Somehow that makes it ok. I can't explain myself, I'm just going off my gut here. (Valentino Dress)

Karolina Kurkova looks like a gilded alien femme bot (in the best way) and RZ (also wearing her own line) looks positively radiant (read: less creased). She has been fucking with the botox needle hard, and I hate to say it but it looks fantastic.

I kind of feel like Lena Dunham's Wes Gordon dress was the result of a project runway challenge where Heidi gave the designers 1 hour to create a Met Gala look and this designer had a total meltdown when he thought someone stole his thread and ran out of time before he could properly finish the hem. I will say this: it's nice to see her looking so un-Hannah like IRL. Because I'm pretty sure she plays herself on the show, 'Girls.' (BTW: thoughts on Girls? I think it's well written and has charming and funny as well as horribly awkwardly unfunny moments. But I'm giving it a try. And yes, it is so totally whitewashed).

Ok, I know I should give her a pass because she's a model, but I honestly don't appreciate the fact that I can see the fascia that attach Anja Rubic's hip bone to her femur. I also don't appreciate that someone (her makeup artist?) rubbed oil on it before going out so that it looks even more pointy and sad. All I can say is, holy boob tape. (Anthony Vaccarello dress)

And last but not least, Kirsten Dunst's homage to Mrs. Claus. I'm racking my brain trying to figure out if this Rodarte outfit could ever manage to not look Yuletide-y. And I think I've come to the conclusion that no, I will not ever look at it and not get "Santa Baby" spinning around in my head. It is what it is.

So, how about you all? Favorites? Disappointments? Thoughts? Concerns?

rainy day women

wearing J Crew coat, Martin + Osa sweater, Juicy Couture shorts, DKNY tights, unknown socks, Hunter boots, thrifted bag

I'm in social isolation right now because I haven't yet seen the season finale of Mad Men and I'm terrified of being exposed to plot spoilers. No Facebook, no TV, and definitely no conversing with co-workers who like to talk LOUDLY about last night's episode. The fuck is wrong with people?!

Also, prepare to die. My nails. The sugar skulls painted by...wait for it...my boyfriend. I am in absolute awe of his patience and so thankful that he's the type of guy who will put off studying to help satisfy my craving for Mexican cultural imagery on my fingernails. Baby, you get me.

sister wife

When I wore this skirt to work yesterday, one of my colleagues started calling me "Big Love."

I guess that makes this outfit Church of LDS approved. Oh joy.

wearing skirt from Ramona West Vintage, Beautiful People (?) sweater, random tank, vintage belt, H&M socks, and Dolce Vita boots

extreme poodles

Watching a show about competitive poodle grooming has gotten me thinking about the myriad creative outlets we have for our deep-seated daddy issues and psychoses. It's just kind of sad to take it out on a poodle, don't ya think? At least have the decency to put your toddler in a swimsuit competition or marry a Real Doll. Leave the fucking dog out of it.

To make it worse, entrants are judged in the following categories:

- Scissoring (seriously)

- dye job

- "wow" factor




Kobe does not approve of extreme scissoring:

the hills: it went there

I guess its fitting that The Hills is ending just as my 20s are winding down. Somehow it would be unseemly to watch it past the age of 29. But goddammit I'm still sad. No other show has so thoroughly managed to fulfill my hunger for inane social conversation, vacant moody staring, half-assed bitchfights, disfiguring plastic surgery, and enough self tanner to cover the surface of the planet--twice. I have to stop or I'll start crying.

For now I leave you with my leopard print nails and a bunch of emoticlips from the Best Fake Reality Show Ever Created.







And finally, the funniest Hills spoof ever:

familiar face

Recognize this gorgeous ginger-colored girl?

Photos by Kathryn Hancock via Fashion Gone Rogue

It's Nicole from America's Next Top Model Cycle 13! Apparently winning ANTM isn't professional anathema.

I did actually think she took some really beautiful photos during that cycle.

so, this is war

top to bottom: Illustration by Sylvia Ji, Alexander McQueen "Titanic" pumps via Fashioncopious, bare legs at the Dolce & Gabbana finale via Jak & Jil, and Freja Beha by Solve Sundsbo.

At the end of a long, unnecessarily cruel week, sometimes I just like to come home, get into the ugliest sweats I own, and feel sorry for myself while having imaginary conversations with my tormentors. This may or may not be accompanied by multiple episodes of The Millionaire Matchmaker because Patti Stanger doesn't take any bullshit.

world cultures

A weekend jaunt to Black and Brown turned up this heavily brocaded 60's Eastern-European-meets-boho-chic vest that weighs in at a good 3 lbs. Anyone with any cognizance of world cultures who wants to tell me where it could be from, please share. I'll buy you a cupcake.

Also, finally ripped, prodded, sanded, and chiseled my acrylic nails off and sprung for the Calgel manicure at Bisou Nail Lounge in Oakland. Of course, I had to go for an Ombre pattern for my first time out. I'll let you guys know how it wears, but so far I'm optimistic and excited about the prospect of not completely ruining my natural nails. Oh, and I can suddenly type about 25% faster now that they're a more sensible (read: non-Rihanna) length.

ps

Completely OT, but can we take a second to talk about the piece of Guido magic better known as The Jersey Shore? It's possibly the most beautiful ode to sharpie eyebrows, tanning beds, and fist-pumping ever created. MTV is getting really good at queefing out these little nuggets of greatness. Well played, MTV.

you could be a farmer in those clothes.

wearing plaid shirt from Target, Gap t-shirt, Gap jeans, vintage Frye boots, unknown necklace, Christian Dior sunglasses

Forgive me, I need to take a moment to complain about Project Runway. I watched the first episode on Sunday and was concerned about a number of developments that led me to believe the show has gone waaay low-budget. First, it's on Lifetime, which is weird because I thought Lifetime only showed movies about women being victimized by men/impregnated at 16/kidnapped by a next door neighbor, etc., etc. Secondly, it's in LA, which is a total downgrade from NY (not just on the show but like, in general). As if to drive home the fact that it's gone downhill, the best guest judge they could get was Lindsay Lohan. Very disappointing, though mildly entertaining to watch her vote off the one designer who looked A LOT like Samantha Ronson. Surely I'm not the only one who noticed??

With all that being said, unless they get rid of Tim Gunn (don't even THINK about it) I'll probably watch even if they start using cocker spaniels as models and former cast members of The Real Housewives of New Jersey as designers. My standards are pretty low.

ps
I got these Frye boots at my favorite vintage store for $45. Sometimes it SO pays not to buy something on ebay. I never would have been able to get them for so cheap.

just some shit i'm loving right now

top to bottom: red tights via Lolitas.se; Marilyn Monroe via Shorpy; Lil' Wayne via yay!everyday; crystal skull by artist Damian Hirst via yay!everyday

Currently watching the second season of Mad Men and marveling at the sheer size of Christina Hendricks' bust. I believe the word 'stacked' comes to mind. Watching this show always makes me think I should take up smoking again because it looks so goddamn hot, especially with pencil skirts. Unfortunately like so many things, smoking is better in theory than in stinky, cancerous reality. Lame.

Thanks to everyone who has already entered the Chickdowntown contest and giveaway. I figured I needed to benefit in some way from this little arrangement, so I'm forcing you all to cough up your secret photo inspiration sources for a chance to win. See post below for further instructions, but it's not rocket science:

Step 1: comment on this or the post below with your email address

Step 2: Give me the name of your super top-secret online source for photo inspiration

If your suggestion inspires me more than any of the others, you get to choose any item from BB Dakota or any Love Quotes scarf from Chickdowntown's site. Pretty easy, huh? So, do it then!

Outfit post tomorrow, I promise.